Sunday, July 25, 2010
Last night before going to bed I once again conducted the experiment that I have tried so many times before. And, once again, I could see no scientific proof that the experiment was a success. So, being the dedicated non-professional that I am, I know that I will continue running the same experiment until I have success. I am that committed to the outcome I seek. The experiment, Sleep Learning. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, once again I fell asleep with my laptop in front of me. Concentrate as hard as I could, I absorbed no more knowledge than dozing off without the computer in my lap. How many times must I repeat the trials of science with the same outcome, before there is a miraculous breakthrough that will benefit all mankind? I shall persevere, my friends. For, to not try would do a disservice to the scientific community, geeks everywhere, and anybody that enjoys a good nap. Fear not, my friends. For I look out for you and my sleep learning experiments shall one day be victorious.
Today is February 12th, 2010 in a small community north of
. Well, to be accurate, it is February 12th, 2010 in other places, too. Last week it was fairly warm, but oh so wet. It rained, and rained, and rained some more. On Tuesday I was afraid that I would not be able to make the trek up and down the 130 feet of my poor soggy driveway. My pickup truck can usually handle just about anything. But the huge amount of rain that we have been blessed with in the last week certainly put my truck to the test. So, in a display of brilliance not often delivered by my brain, I decided to park on the opposite side of the circle drive that doesn’t see much traffic. I was so proud of myself. There is a fair amount of gravel on that side of the drive and almost never gets bogged down in mud. The well traveled side of the drive now has ruts about 8 to 9 inches deep that are completely full of water now. So, as I walked out to my truck Tuesday morning to go to work I hardly got my boots muddy. I was feeling a little smug as I had put one over on mother-nature. She wasn’t going to get my truck and I muddy another day. I backed out and just barely got off the drive onto the yard, and promptly sunk the truck about 5 inches. Not to worry. The back wheels weren’t that far off the drive, and didn’t seem to be that deep. I’ve done this before and I can do it again. Slowly give it a little gas and watch the tires spin, in place. Not what I had in mind. Rock the truck, that’s it. I tried that, but what I forgot was that the truck has to move at least a little bit for it to rock, not just spin in place. I thought I could do this. Did I forget to mention that I’m the same person that got my grandfather’s 65 horsepower farm tractor buried up to the axles. We had to “pole” the tractor out. Probably only the country folks reading this have a clue what it means to “pole” a tractor. So, what did I do. I did what every red blooded budding female would do. I put my head on the steering wheel and cried. Yes, five months on HRT have been working on me. I have noticed that I cry at the drop of a hat, lately. Don’t ask me why. I know it doesn’t really hurt the hat. I knew that it was coming. Other girls have told me that they got very emotional at different stages of transition. So, why wasn’t I prepared for it. Girls have told me that they wore their feelings on their sleeves. I prefer to carry mine in a cute little Coach purse. Not really. I’m transitioning. I can’t afford Coach. Who am I kidding. I couldn’t afford Coach if I wasn’t transitioning. So, how did I get my truck unstuck? Did I use my feminine wiles to charm some man into helping a poor female in distress? Although I did ask a neighbor down the road to help me, my feminine wiles and charm are still in reserve for another day. In my amateurish opinion, feminine wiles and charm are like sage. Best when used sparingly. Does that make this sage advice? Tyler, Texas